Aug 11, 2013

3 months after graduation

ah. it has been nearly 2 months ^^
have been doing a freelance job that ends this week.
in september i am taking a month trip overseas, and in october i'm going to do my best to find an apartment in new york..somewhere..haha.
i've been really confused about how i should "market" myself.
i have trouble trying to call myself one specific thing, like "illustrator," or "animator," etc. etc. because i don't think i'm any of those.
i'm probably a bit scared, because i'm not quite good at anything yet, and in the industry, they say you get your foot in the door by doing one thing really well. a technical skill.
honestly, more and more i think i'm not an animator. i love and appreciate the medium so much, but actually doing it is a little bit like torture. is it because my technical skills are too lacking? or am i genuinely not interested in animating in and of itself?
i do love most the design and development part of production.

so while i flounder around hopelessly, i've been developing a story. it's been fun just drawing, like when i was little. the ideas have been floating in my mind since may.

more to come. i don't know in what way this story should be executed. but if there's anything i learned from school, it's that every time i think i "should" do something a certain way, it always fails. some things are their own thing, have their own innate way of expression.

i guess it's my job to try and let that happen without letting my own brain get in the way.

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